You have waited a little while for the second part of this story.
Mr Thomas Butler was preaching and at the time felt he had to tell his hearers about the Lord’s dealings with his soul. He continues…
I lived until I was 19 years old without any fear – the fear of God. I went to chapel and church but felt no grief for the sin’s I had committed. I had some qualms of conscience and saw the way I was living to be wrong, but, in my ignorance, I thought I should one day turn, that I would have a little more pleasure and then give myself to God and his ways. Let me tell you the preacher goes on to say, A man taught of the Spirit of God, and bought down as a helpless sinner, can never talk this way. It is nothing but solemn presumption.
One Monday morning, as I lay upon my bed, the Spirit convinced me that I was a sinner, I cannot describe my feelings to any person. What Paul felt on the way to Damascus he could not forget and you and I will never forget when God begins the work of grace. It was as if God was looking down on me in anger, I groaned, being burdened, Oh! What a terrible state I was in. I felt myself a sinner, and thought God was about to enter into judgement with me. My landlady asked me what was the matter and I could not tell her. I felt as if every sin was charged home, like so many arrows, and I thought I should be hastily sent down into the pit, yet in my soul was the cry “Lord, spare me” The doctor was sent for, and when he came, I could not express my feelings to him either.
When brought under the sentence of the law, then I could see something of its true character, there was something more than my outward sins. I felt that no man living could be justified in God’s sight. He that offended in one point is guilty of all.
I tell you what, poor sinner, the preacher continues. Before you know the liberty of the gospel and what it is to be clothed with the righteousness of Christ you will be brought to be a naked sinner; but if brought there, and the blessed Jesus deigns to smile, you will taste a little of real religion; and then what vanity all other religion will appear!
Oh the longsuffering of God!, I was favoured sometimes with sense of blood-bought pardon. One night in Guys Hospital in London – I shall never forget it, I lay in great distress. I had been under this sentence of death and was reduced to a skeleton. I lay there and thought ere the morning appeared the Lord would send me to hell. I could see I deserved it, I should be there. Arh! But the spirit of God poured on me a spirit of supplication (prayer) and shewed me by precious faith the Lamb of God, The Lord Jesus Christ. Oh ! what a sweet view I had of Him that night in the hospital, as dying for his people.
The preacher concludes..
Perhaps you are saying, I feel grief, I feel sin, but what I want to realise is the gracious compassion of Jesus Christ, to feel his forgiveness, to feel he lived and died and rose again for my poor soul, I want him to have compassion on my soul.
He finished his sermon and quoted the text. (Lamentations 3 v 32) and sat down. The last hymn was sung and the people quietly left the chapel thinking upon the words the preacher had spoken.
